How to stop comparing yourself with others?

How to stop comparing yourself

Do you always compare yourself with others? Do you often see others achievements vs you own? Do you feel that others are living their life in a great way than you own?

Comparing yourself to others is one of the easiest ways to get upset and feel about yourself. You see what people are doing in social media, at workplace, in relationships, and compare yourself with these folks.

“A flower does not think of competing with the flower next to it. It just blooms.”

Why is it bad to compare?

Comparing yourself to others is one of the easiest ways to get upset and feel about yourself. You see what people are doing in social media, at workplace, in relationships, and compare yourself with these folks.

When you start comparing, everyone seems to be more wealthier than you. Everyone has better job title and nicer home. Everyone are better looking and are physical fit as well, or they just have better time in their life.

These comparisons often leads us to be more negative in life. And ultimately leads us to path of unhappiness. They often make you feel jealous, inferior, and inadequate. This leads to poor decision making because you have greater stress, anxiety, and depression.

In short, comparing yourself to others just makes you even more worse and set up a path for failure. Read more about why is it bad to compare yourself with others in our detailed article.

Following are some of those ways which will tell you how to stop comparing yourself to others:

Accept Yourself

Before you start making any real changes to your life, you need to start accepting yourself and who you are. Stop living in some world of imagination where you always think this is how I am supposed to be.

For example: Consider you and your friend have started business individually. You have stopped it because of money or whatever reason and switched to day time job. Your friend continued to run the business and after 5 years he is making a lot of money. Thinking this and feeling jealous all the time is unfair, as your friend might have worked hard to make the business grow. While, you can also do it, but you will have to start from the position of the beginner.

Accept who you are today and only compare yourself to who you are last week/month.

Living Intentionally

Intentional living is all about making conscious decision about your life with respect to values, goals, dreams and ethics. It is a step by step guide in making who you are to who you want to be.

Sounds good, doesn’t it?

One of the major advantage of living life intentionally is “living in the moment”. It simply means enjoying what you do with what you have, rather than thinking what you could do if you have xyz things.

This concept doesn’t work with the idea of comparing yourself to others. You simply cannot enjoy every moment of your life when you are comparing to others.

Following Gratitude

Gratitude is an important concept which unfortunately many people aren’t aware of. When you are grateful for the things you have in your life, you tend to be more grateful to the things you have achieved and acknowledge your success.

Gratitude helps you to not just recognize your own success and appreciate it, but also allows you to identify people who were part of you and help you along the way to get to where you are today.

One of the best ways to follow gratitude is by noting down at the beginning or end of every day what were your accomplishments. What are you really proud of in the entire day? How was today better than yesterday? Who are those people who helped you today? Who are those whom you are thankful to?

Life is not a competition

Most people think life is a competition, a race wherein you need to compete with everyone on day to day basis. But life is not something which you can “win”. It is something which you need to enjoy and live. Many people who are super successful in some of the aspects, might have witnessed complete failure in others aspects.

Because life is not a game, you should just stop competing. Don’t worry how far or behind others you from you. Learn to work with others in harmony so that everyone around you are happy.

And even after this if you still want to compare, then don’t compare yourself to others. Instead compare to yourself. Compare yourself to yourself is the only fair comparison you can make.

For Example: Compare yourself to how you were and how you are as against previous month. Compare what all things you have learnt in this year vs last year and so on.

P.S. Compare apples to apples only and not to any other fruits.