s Why do people take things personally? - Chintan Jain

Why do people take things personally?

Why people take things personally?

It all starts with a story. The other day when I was going around for jogging and exercise in my apartment. As I was finishing my jog, a guy whom I have never interacted in the past, said me “Good Day Ahead”. I have also responded the same for him and continued my jog. As I was leaving, I heard the guy saying

“You’re so rude. Don’t you have manners. When someone greets you, it is a good behavior to greet them back.”

I immediately stopped and turned back to the person. I understood he was talking to me. Obviously, he didn’t hear me when I was greeting him. It was evident that he has already made a conclusion that I didn’t greet him and therefore he took it personally. Although the fact was that he didn’t listen to my greeting. So I responded back to him saying that I have greeted you for the same.

“What I really wanted to tell him was that he needs to learn how to stop taking things personally.”

Ever imagined scenarios like this in our day to day where we had good intentions about other people or we were trying to help them, but for some reason they took it personally in a negative way.

Why does this Happen

Taking things personally is a true sign of low self esteem. When you take things personally, you are sensitive to words or actions of others and many a times you take things in a negative way about yourself or others. Perhaps, someone has said something about you and you are taking it as an insult on yourself. Or maybe, you are assuming that the other person don’t like you.

Taking things personally causes you to feel insecure, ashamed, inadequate, or sometimes even angry. It can totally lowen your self confidence and most times self-esteem too.

The moment you start taking things personally is reflection of your own insecurity. And many a times your mind would be designed in a way to interpret things in a negative way all the time with regards to a situation or person. This can be very problematic in future.

Here are some of the emotional reasons why we take things personally:

--> Deep down, you agree with the critique

--> You feel somebody has shown your mistakes/flaws in an open forum and you can't take it

--> You always try to compare the person/situation with past experiences

--> You perceive that you are been treated unfairly in a given situation

--> You are feeling excluded

--> You have unrealistic expectations

The good news is that you can easily build an attitude to stop taking things personally using some of the following ways:

Read - How to stop taking things personally?